Well, I'm without a computer for a little while. My laptop had a flash encounter with a mug of hot peppermint-nettle tea and a rambunctious silver rabbit, which, all things considered, is not a bad way to go. Hopefully it's just the keyboard that's been affected and it'll be geeked back into working order over the next few days. I dug out my ancient MacBook G4 the night of the incident, but the internet seems to have left it in the dust.
I'm hoping to crowdsource healing vibes for my bunny. Seven's misaligned teeth are long and jagged and have started cutting into her gums where they've caused at least one abscess, possibly two. We're waiting for a call from the veterinary dental specialist to find out how soon we can get her in. It looks so painful. I am hoping desperately, fearfully, that she will continue eating despite the pain. She's hiding in a cardboard box right now and I am terrified and anxious and so sad to see her like this. She is the sweetest little curious creature. Please send love her way. Welcome spring, new moon, eclipse. I hope you will be kind to my rabbit. This morning began enjoyably, at least. We had a friend visiting (though I had completely misunderstood when she would arrive so was ill prepared to host), and went for a walk in the drizzle. We were soon joined by coffee and butter danishes, as can happen in our neck of the woods, and paid a casual visit to the ocean's edge. My mum came by with gifts and treasures from my beautiful, quirky late grandmother, and seeds for our garden. We ventured out to the theme of more coffee and pastries (oh what a way to spend a Friday!), and Jer and Ana came back from downtown with more gifts and delectables. Then we wrangled the bunnies into their carrier for their check-in with the vet. Ever since the vet looked in Seven's mouth and found that the situation we thought was six months away and that we were going to prevent by getting her teeth done in the next few months had sped up and was already happening, already urgent, the afternoon has crept by dark and tearful. I picked up more strawberry antibiotics in town and, in a sorry daze, made my way towards the Solstice Cafe for tea and solace. Alas, they'd closed for a special event, so I trudged aimlessly into the square. I almost sat on a bench in the rain to eat chocolates and read my sad and beautiful book - did sit for a moment, but some boys were horsing around on the high railing and spitting and I really didn't feel like listening to them so kept going, into Green Cuisine, where one can be nourished for $6. It was soothing. I sat in a booth near the back, facing a poster of Green Tara and a tree mural. I ate small tidbits each of baked falafel and steamed kale, curried tempeh, vegan lasagna, squash, beans and apple crumble (comfort me with spiced apples please, yes). Afterwards, I sat, unable to read, and gave myself a headache panicking about it all before picking up a pen and doodling in my journal. Never underestimate the therapeutic benefits of making art. It didn't fix everything, but it helped. I drew some trees, gave them leaves, then filled in ground level with flowers and leafy sprigs, and got the idea of drawing Seven in, happy and well. I drew Zephyr too, to help anchor her in this world and because they are constant companions. Next a field of wheat and flowering clover, both bunnies settled happily in the center.
I'm drinking strong peppermint tea, adaptogen extraordinaire. I'm hoping it will help me cope. It's hard to stand up straight under the weight of this, my fear and sadness for my darling pet. The vets know what they are doing, this I trust. I hope that we can get her treated sooner than soon. Now, to think positive and give my bunny love. May she be well.
This evening we drove up island with Jer's parents (there is a long story here but they tell it better). The overcast day had given way to light rain and glowing golden haze in the west. Beyond the city, the mountains were faint as carved clouds. As we drove into the hills around Goldstream, swaths of cloud clung in chunks to the wet trees. Up on the farm under the dark, spangled sky, choruses of frogs were singing. On the way home, mist swirled on the road. Now, here at home on the striped blanket in our living room, Zephyr the bunny is getting extra sly at sneaking bites of houseplant.
Seven the sweet bunny has an ear infection. And her teeth are a little offset so she needs to have some dental work done. Poor baby. This morning I tried to apply online for a job I found a couple days ago. The pay wasn't great, but the work seemed alright and for an interesting business in the healthy foods industry. I hit the submit button and it didn't work. Tried another ten times (because that totally helps...), but it looks like the ad got taken down already. The most frustrating thing about missed opportunities is that I can only blame myself. Did a semi-desperate search of the job board again. I'm getting pretty tired of chasing around jobs that pay only slightly better than minimum wage. I could just keep doing what I'm doing, which I like for 3 days of the week and dislike for 2 days, and hope that eventually I can switch to better hours or that something ideal will someday come up for me. Or, I have this back-up plan: I could go back up north for the summer as a wildfire dispatcher, which is a pretty neat job with awesome pay, but it really sucks to be so far away from home and from my man and the bunnies and everyone. The awesome pay would help us pay off student debts so we could get on with having better lives. I need to decide pretty soon though because the application deadline is probably right around the end of this month. I've filled out the forms. One minute, I've decided that I'll go. Thirty seconds later, I'm staying for sure. Back and forth. 1,765 km from home is not to be taken lightly. With the money I make we would be closer to being able to afford to start a family. But what is money to almost half a year apart? There, butterflies and big active skies, relentless sunshine and aspen trees of the boreal forest. It is undeniably beautiful. The bugs are so bad I spent most of my spare time indoors. Not to mention fear of dry lightening strikes. Here, dipping into the ocean at the end of the day. Family. Home. Garden parties and cool evening breezes. What is it worth? I think I need some help with this one.
There have been shriveled mandarin oranges sitting neglected in the fruit bowl for ages here, since other citrus have come and gone and fresh kiwis are available at the farmers market. In order to save them from sitting longer or worse, hitting the compost, I thought it was worth a try baking them into scones. I am pretty devoted to Molly Wizenberg's Scottish Scone recipe so I thought I would try a variation of it here. I'd say that I've had more luck when I followed her original recipe more closely, and with fruit like raspberries, strawberries or rhubarb. The dough was a little sticky, but manageable. The orange segments were wily and resistant when I divided the dough into scones, but it could just be that I need to sharpen our knives. After 15 minutes in the oven, these still looked quite pale so I left them another five-ish minutes but may have overbaked them slightly as I feel they could be more tender. A recipe that needs more testing perhaps, but a pretty tasty way to use up languishing oranges.
Orange Oat Cardamom Scones recipe based on these scones by Orangette 1 cup all-purpose flour 1 cup oat flour (you can make this! - or buy it, or just substitute all-purpose flour or WW pastry flour or something) 2 tsp baking powder 3/4 tsp salt 1 tbsp ground cardamom 3 tbsp vanilla sugar (aka cane sugar that has vanilla beans hanging out in it from the last time you made something with a vanilla bean. Organic cane sugar is nicest.) 2 oz butter, cubed and chilled zest of 3 small mandarin oranges 7 small mandarin oranges, peeled, segmented and de-seeded 1 egg 1/2 cup whole milk (Not homogenized though because your body doesn't know what to do with the tiny fat particles- get the kind with the cream on top. Cream of some kind could be deliciously substituted.) Preheat oven to 425º. Stir together dry ingredients. Cut in butter until the lumps are not bigger than a pea. Toss in fruit and zest. In a small bowl, whisk together the egg and milk, then add it to the dry ingredients, reserving about 1 1/2 tbsp to use as a wash, then gently stirring/folding with a wooden spoon until the dough barely comes together. Turn it onto a lightly floured surface and knead it just until it's cohesive, as few times as possible. Flatten dough into a circle, about 1/2" thick, then slice it into 8-12 scones. Place on a parchment-lined baking sheet and brush with the egg-milk wash (if it looks like you won't have enough then thin it out with some milk or water). I sprinkled a little vanilla sugar on top but it kind of disappeared during baking. Medium or coarse sugar would be better, and I will eventually buy some. Bake 10-15 minutes, until golden, or longer if it still looks doughy. Cool on a wire rack (but eat while still warm, with butter). These should keep for a few days in a cookie tin, and might be nice if re-heated in a toaster.